It is in this moment that I’ll remind myself, as I’ve done many times before, that I’ve actually already received every single one of these gifts. I don’t need them; they’re already mine. They may bury themselves down deep inside sometimes, but they’re there.
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Each year since then, we have survived and come out the other end stronger. My husband sacrifices time with his family. His children sacrifice time with their dad. I sacrifice time with my husband and partner. But if you accepted the position, then you accepted the good with the bad and you do what you […]
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Days after my oldest was born, I found myself walking around in a fog. I was still recovering from a painful cesarean delivery—one I hadn’t planned for or expected. I was trying to adjust to my new normal: sleep deprivation, stressing about trying to nurse my baby and looking beyond recognition. “Welcome to Motherhood,” I […]
The tree is up, the presents are wrapped, and from the outside everything looks normal. But there’s an empty chair at the table and an empty feeling in your heart. The holidays can be hard when hard your spouse is deployed. My husband and I have spent our fair share of holidays separated after 9/11, when […]
I’m lucky that in the span of our conversation, we bridged the gap that had formed between us. We could try again. And this time, we started over with the understanding that we were different. We started over knowing that we could be completely ourselves with one another; that we had the permission to disagree.
He had to be wheeled into my hospital room to hold Sam. We all hoped that he would be around long enough to see as many of Sam’s firsts as possible. Sadly, though, he died of cancer in 2013. My son was 14 months old. As anyone who has watched someone they love die of […]
That’s the thing, I didn’t need it anyway. It didn’t fit because there were too many dishes in their in the first place. Dishes I use maybe once a year. Dishes I was given or collected, but simply added to the stack rather than to replace another one. Too much stuff, everywhere, there is too […]
Driving around and looking at Christmas lights is another tradition we started as newlyweds. Dressed in our pajamas, we hop in the car, get hot chocolate at the Starbucks drive-thru and find the best musical Christmas light shows in Colorado Springs. Our daughter is old enough to thoroughly enjoy it now. She loves the lights, […]