Occupation: Motherhood’s New Resume

We all know the feeling of sitting in a waiting room and filling out endless amounts of paperwork.

Everything is going smoothly until you get to the dreaded question of occupation. For me, it has been 3.5 years since I have had a solid, clear cut answer to this question. But for some, only putting down your profession doesn’t seem like enough–shouldn’t they know that you can do so much more now? 

I find cute ways to answer now that I’m a mom and I stay home with my kids. But it never fails to seem like a punch in the gut–despite me loving being home with my kids

Whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mom, we all have skills that we can now add to our resume that only motherhood could attribute to us. 

Occupation: Motherhood's New ResumeThese are a few accurate, humorous, and incredibly true bullet points that I can now successfully add to my ‘mom resume’ in no certain order:

  1. Degrees in:
    • Meditation, Anger Counseling, and Just Winging It
  2. Expertise in re-rolling toilet paper that has been pulled all the way off…
  3. Food Producer
    • Milk production
    • Preparing bottles — always warm and tastes just right 
  4. Expert shopping cart driver throughout all Costcos and Targets
  5. Professional Butt Wiper
  6. Skilled coffee reheater
  7. Able to pull 24-hour shifts with no sleep or breaks required
  8. Excels in Multitasking
    • Can feed a human while doing everything else.
    • Able to pump while answering Emails
  9. Quick at deducing information 
    • Poop versus chocolate…
    • Who colored all over everything
    • Which one has the dirty diaper
    • Your kid’s cry versus another’s 
  10. Proficient in ordering food
    • Takeout 
    • Online grocery shopping
  11. Can quickly pick-up & drop-off children of all ages to different places 
  12. Hostage negotiation skills honed in hundreds of hours of bedtime routines
  13. Can handle many conversations at once
  14. Strong in serving others from sun up to sun down
  15. Consoling over injuries, frustrations, and disappointments

What would you add to this list? I would love to have more ideas to continue to add, as motherhood is never ending. Your resume is stellar, Mama.

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One Response to Occupation: Motherhood’s New Resume

  1. Marilyn July 31, 2017 at 8:30 am #

    Great one Mama Katie!

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