Where are all the Working Moms?

I know you’re out there. Are you looking for me, too? I hear there are a lot of us these days, but I don’t stumble across many when I’m out in the wild (but I get it, because I spend my evenings at home trying to convince myself not to go to bed earlier than 9:00, also). I’m talking to the other working moms of the world. Stay-at-home moms don’t have it easy, there are moms who work from home while their kids are napping and at school, and there are tons of moms who fall somewhere in-between. I’m looking for the moms who get up at 6 a.m. every morning, get themselves (and their kids!) in real clothing, and are out the door in less than two hours, ready to report for another eight (or nine or ten) hours at the office.

I’m not “working just for now,” or trying to make money from home. This is who I am: a woman with a career and a family. I’m the mom who works in an office building, Monday through Friday, 40 hours a week. And I’m looking for the rest of us. When I see calls for motherhood friendship online, I rarely see gatherings that are suitable for working moms. I can’t make it to Tuesday morning playgroups, or Wednesday afternoon MOPS. Not this week, not ever. I’m not saying these groups aren’t justified, I’m just saying I can’t find mine.

When I first had my daughter, I mostly worked with single, recent college grads. I was one of two people (in a department of 30) who had a child, and it was isolating. In Texas, it took me over a year of motherhood and a career change to find my people. Since moving back to Colorado, I’ve started over. I need friends who understand having to save up your sick days so you can use them when your child is sick, dealing with daycare and preschool enrollment, and the moms who have had to coordinate FMLA and short-term disability insurance when they gave birth.

I’d like to find the moms who can commiserate about how, even after years of working, there are still days when you have to pry your child off your leg when you leave the house in the morning and you try not to tear up about it on your morning commute. And, because of this, I’m not very dependable for frequent social activities. Sure, I can get together once a month or so, but I also really value the evenings with my family and the few, precious hours when my daughter is asleep before I turn in myself.

working moms

So, where are you, working moms?

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12 Responses to Where are all the Working Moms?

  1. Jenny
    Jenny September 28, 2016 at 6:52 am #

    Raising my hand and jumping up and down and saying me too!!!

    • Sara
      Sara September 28, 2016 at 8:19 am #

      Yes! We’re a breed all our own, and I’m not sure where the rest of us are! Glad you could relate, Jenny!

  2. Sara September 28, 2016 at 8:36 am #

    I joined a Bunco group that met once a month. Stuck with it for a year, at which point I decided that I was probably never going to be able to develop any actual friendships with those ladies. We were all comfortable around each other after having gotten together that many times, but that was it. Friendships are hard, and I wish I knew why! It seems to come so naturally to some, and not to others (like me 🙂 )

    • Sara Lewis
      Sara Lewis September 28, 2016 at 10:25 am #

      Okay, I was actually thinking this comment may have been written by an alternate universe version of myself. Same name, same spelling, same experience with bunco! Haha. I think friendships are hard in general, especially as you get older and narrow down which kind of people you really enjoy being with, then add in busy schedules and it gets really complicated!

  3. Rachel
    Rachel September 28, 2016 at 9:12 am #

    I know, it is so hard to find mom groups willing to meet on weekends for play dates. We got lucky with our group of friends, but since it is the Dad’s too, we always meet on weekends. Though, there are no organized working mom groups, I agree.

    • Sara Lewis
      Sara Lewis September 28, 2016 at 10:27 am #

      Yes, it is difficult! I get it, though – stay-at-home moms married to men who work full-time want to spend time as a family on weekends rather than go to playdates. But what are the rest of us supposed to do? Use PTO once a month so I can go to Thursday morning MOPS? Haha!

  4. Nikki Aragona September 28, 2016 at 9:53 am #

    My husband and I just moved here from Texas this summer with our 7 month old and 2 1/2 yr old and I’d love to meet some other working mommas! ?

    • Sara Lewis
      Sara Lewis September 28, 2016 at 10:29 am #

      Yes! It is so hard, especially right after relocating. I feel you! Maybe between all of the mommas on here, we can figure something out 🙂 Thanks for reading, Nikki!

  5. Rachel B September 28, 2016 at 10:01 am #

    I’ve been looking for one too! I’m expecting my first baby in December, and will be back to work 9-5ish after a few months maternity leave. Would be great to know some other career mamas for friendship and advice for a newbee!

    • Sara Lewis
      Sara Lewis September 28, 2016 at 10:31 am #

      Maybe something will come from this and us working moms can band together! It’s so hard with a newborn, but you’ll do amazing! You’ll become one tough cookie in no time 🙂 Thanks for reading, Rachel!

  6. Stacey September 28, 2016 at 2:32 pm #

    It can get super lonely being a working mother. Moms NEED friends and it is so hard to not have time available to develop friendships. It would be so great if we could all start something together.

  7. lynnse Wilson September 28, 2016 at 2:56 pm #

    Im here!! im here!! im here!! Im a mother of 3 and a hairstylist…. and i only socailize with my mama tribe who are all working mamas too lol Tips: 1. Balance is a myth 2. Schedule your sex life.

    Your welcome:)

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