Now, we’re living in Colorado Springs (woo!), I work full-time and Luke is a stay-at-home dad. And I love it. I can tell you that I’m a completely different person than I was a year ago. My anxiety is the lowest it’s been since I became a mom, my time with my daughter is filled with so much more joy, and our house is cleaner than I ever could have dreamed. I am very fortunate to have a husband who sees being a stay-at-home parent as his job. I honestly don’t remember the last time I did the dishes, and I know I haven’t cleaned our bathroom since we’ve had our current arrangement. It’s a beautiful thing.
Being the spouse of a stay-at-home parent is absolutely beautiful. I get to go to a job that I really love and find very fulfilling, which is what I’ve been working towards my entire life. The bonus now is that I don’t have to wonder what my daughter is doing that day. I come home to a clean house and a fully stocked fridge (most days). I don’t spend an extra hour in the car everyday taking my daughter to and from daycare as the bookends of my workday, and I don’t have to ask my boss if I can leave early because my daughter is sick or I need to get to the grocery store before the rush because all we have in our fridge is three-week-old grapes and half a carton of cottage cheese. Basically, my life has reached a level of chaos that I find manageable.
The biggest obstacle I’ve faced is the common small-talk question people ask women: “What does your husband do?” I used to feel like I owed people an explanation. “Oh, he’s staying at home right now, but he’s going to start school soon.” “We did full time daycare in Texas and hated it, so he’s staying home with my daughter for now.” Recently, I stopped with the explanations. I have always believed people don’t owe anyone an explanation for their lives and choices, but I struggled with this for some reason. I don’t have to explain to anyone that my husband stays at home because in our marriage, that’s just what works better.
What I’ve learned most from being a single-income family with a working mom and stay-at-home dad is that families just have to find out what works best for them. Maybe both parents work and the kids go to daycare – great. Maybe Mom stays home and Dad works – awesome. Maybe Dad works full-time during the week and mom works part-time on the weekend – super. Do whatever pays the bills and brings you happiness.
Awesome that you state the pros and cons. not just all fluff 🙂 hope to hear more from you
Comments are closed.